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Betrayal: Can We Get Over It? | Psychology Today

God has a goal in mind for us. It could bring us into conflict with those we love most.

Betrayal is a gross violation of trust and can be one of the most devastating forms of pain inflicted upon us. The suffering of betrayal is often magnified by a sense of vulnerability and exposure. I’m not sure I want to go there.

The pain of betrayal can be worse than physical violence, deceit, or prejudice. Betrayal destroys the foundation of trust. As followers of Jesus, the world and the secular worldview hates us. They hate us because of Jesus. Jesus commands total allegiance. That can’t be tolerated by the secularists.

Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child; and children will rise up against parents and cause them to be put to death.

Matthew 10:21

So when Jesus put this bold statement out, was he thinking of euthanasia? It is happening. Who is doing it? Sometimes the parents. Sometimes it is the children. Who would have thought. Life is sacred.

I’ve encounter many who are shocked that they are betrayed. There is a spirit of entitlement that cries out that it is unfair. Justice and judgement belongs to God.

Is betrayal a part of a disciple’s experience? Jesus warns us that we will be betrayed. It may be extreme, leading to death. We must count this cost as a result of following Jesus. It will hurt but Jesus has given us the power of the Holy Spirit.

We are promised a reward. We have hope. We are at peace with what Jesus challenges us to do.

I can trust God. While others may betray me, God will not. God is to be trusted. Now that is some very good news.

Another key in overcoming the pain of betrayal is to remember Jesus’ example. Our sinful nature impels us to “repay evil with evil,” but Jesus taught us otherwise:

Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. . . . Pray for those who persecute you

Matthew 5:39, 44

When Jesus “was abused, he did not return abuse” (1 Peter 2:23). We should conform to His example by not repaying abuse for abuse, including the abuse of betrayal. Believers are to do good even to those who harm them.

  • 2 Timothy 1:12 —For this reason I also suffer these things, but I am not ashamed; for I know whom I have believed and I am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until that day.
  • Psalm 89:33 — “But I will not break off My lovingkindness from him, Nor deal falsely in My faithfulness.
  • Psalm 118:8 —It is better to take refuge in the Master Than to trust in ma
  • Psalm 125:1 —Those who trust in the Master Are as Mount Zion, which cannot be moved but abides forever.
  • Proverbs 29:25 —The fear of man brings a snare, But he who trusts in the Master will be exalted.
  • Isaiah 26:3–4 — “The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, Because he trusts in You. “Trust in the Master forever, For in God the Master, we have an everlasting Rock.

Good news: God is with us and God will keep us. No one can touch our soul and we are eternally secure.